Have you ever experienced one of those 'limbo' moments? You know, knowing there is a path, a way, a choice that MUST be made - it's dire and has to be done or else? We are in 'limbo' today, me and my family. It's not really dire. It's not really easy though either and it's a circumstance that requires wisdom, action and ... well, I am not sure what else, really.
Do you know the historical definition of this word, 'limbo?' I didn't, until today. Ironically enough, there is a religious root (haha). Read below:
Word History: Our use of the word limbo to refer to states of oblivion, confinement, or transition is derived from the theological sense of Limbo as a place where souls remain that cannot enter heaven, for example, unbaptized infants. Limbo in Roman Catholic theology is located on the border of Hell, which explains the name chosen for it. The Latin word limbus, having meanings such as "an ornamental border to a fringe" and "a band or girdle," was chosen by Christian theologians of the Middle Ages to denote this border region. English borrowed the word limbus directly, but the form that caught on in English, limbo, first recorded in a work composed around 1378, is from the ablative form of limbus, the form that would be used in expressions such as in limb, "in Limbo."
This is exactly where I find myself today- a border, a fringe of sorts on the crossroads in life. We have choices to be made. Reliance upon the wisdom of God (the invisible but omnipresent), counsel (ministry and elders) and trust in such is absolutely required. The questions are- where is my trust? In what I know in my worldly wisdom? Or what I cannot see but am promised? What is my portion in this trial? How do I remain calm in the storm? The Word tells me all kinds of things about these types of circumstances and repeatedly, that I am not to trust in my own heart/ways/understanding, but, instead seek Him and His ways through the Word. It is by His grace that today, I am fully prepared in my soul to do these things. It wasn't always so...
I have to be forthright with you (if you are there) and say that since my re- dedication to the Lord and subsequent sobriety-'limbo'- is not a position that I've favored much or settled into nicely when forced. I would typically make a rash, emotional decision or suggestion and just await the outcome. (That my friends, I have learned, is what the Bible refers to as foolishness :o)). As a matter of fact, until about two weeks ago, I had no doubt that I fully trusted God and that my 'impatient' character traits were just 'how I was made.' I was blinded to the notion that my 'impatience' could be a spiritual condition, that it had anything to do with trusting in the Lord or further, it would cause undue or unnecessary pressure in my life (or those I love). (Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now am found,Was blind, but now I see---seriously, NOW I see)! Prayer and deliverance are real!
Trusting God is faith, isn't it? Impatience is lacking an ability to make it through something trying; it is in opposition of the fruit of the Spirit we should aspire to attain (so I am learning).
Patience: enduring trying circumstances with even temper or characterized by such endurance.
My impatience has been a direct result of my lack of trust in God. I can't see how the 'limbo' is going to turn out and therefore, 'I will take the reins now and drive this horse, my way, thank you very much.' How arrogant! And, unfruitful.
It's never turned out as good as it likely would have had I let God lead. We are being tried and today, I pray that in this moment of 'limbo' - I will trust God. I pray for an understanding and peace that is supernatural. I pray for God to be glorified in it and for the lives of those whom I love and pray for to be impacted by it. I pray for peace to be poured into the souls of those who need it- in this moment, in this trial. I pray to trust God more. In Jesus Name, amen.
My lack of trust + my fear of unknown (limbo) = (has ensured my) self sufficiency. What a stinkin' bondage! How slight is all of that? Just slight enough to keep me sustaining myself through and not leaning upon the Lord, right?
Pro 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Pro 3:6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Pro 3:7 Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.
I am encouraged. I know not what our trial will bring forth, or why, or how we will be sustained through it, but I believe God. I thank Him for sending a man of God to pray with me in repentance of distrust and I thank Him for loving me despite my imperfections.
In His hands and for His glory,
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